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 Flirting with the Force A long time ago at a casting call not so far away...
Posted: Tuesday May 18, 1999 02:35 PM
As the great opening day approaches, lines everywhere, I'm as curious as everyone else about "Star Wars, Episode 1: The Phantom Menace." Has George Lucas taken my suggestions? I want to know. Is New York Yankees interim manager Don Zimmer cast as Yoda? Al Davis as Darth Vader? Paul Tagliabue and Bud Selig as droid robots? Was a certain No. 23, the only man who should have the role, hired to be the new Luke Skywalker? Alexi Lalas as Chewbacca? Don King as Obi Wan Kenobi? Or maybe as Jabba the Hutt? Have advertising rights been sold to the starships? You know, making them look something like Jeff Gordon's No. 24 car, rainbow colors and the word "Dupont" across the hood. Is the proper term "Wookie" or "rookie?" I never can remember. Was Mark Hamill once involved with Dorothy Hamill? Will we find out now? In the bar scene is there an undercover cop who will arrest, say, an unsuspecting Atlanta Falcons defensive back or New York Yankees slugger? Is the Biggest Big Bertha now a weapon of mass destruction? Are the Jedi Warriors anything like the Golden State Warriors? Is there a character named P.J.? Does the great void of outer space resemble a night game, fog coming off the bay, at Candlestick Park? Did any of these mutants ever take steroids or andro-whatever-it-is? Did any of them ever hit 71 home runs? Is Han Solo now trying to smuggle Cuban baseball players out of the country to the big leagues? Will Jim Grey and Ahmad Rashad be in the middle of the action to give us updates? Pass the popcorn. I want to know. Sports Illustrated senior writer Leigh Montville appears regularly on CNN/Sports Illustrated.
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